I don’t want to be here. I feel a higher calling and working an 8 to 5 in “cube world” is getting increasingly frustrating with every passing day. There never seems to be enough time to read, study, write, minister, think, or pray.
There is something very “Epicurean and Stoic” (Acts 17) about the technology industry. Technology is constantly evolving into some “new thing”. To keep up requires focus… total attention. This is something I cannot do. I have another love, passion, calling, desire…
This world system, culture, and economy is so focused on drawing my attention away from Jesus and Missional calling.
Let me just cut to the chase… Ministry is my passion and desire. God has called me to a life of completely devoted to Him, in his ministry.
Sometimes I feel as though I have wasted many years “working” in churches where I was not taken seriously. Just another “zealous” young man who is delusional about his ministry calling. The perpetual intern…
Calling… Timing… It is controlled by God. My life is completely surrendered to Jesus.
Job 13:15 Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him: but I will maintain mine own ways before him.
One Comment
Umm, that IS what you are! A pertetual intern. The delusional tag is simply no different than Jesus, is it? Why does it surprise you?
Perhaps a wasted feeling is our propensity to see some tangible results. That’s not an abnormal feeling. In fact I’d wager it’s usual and common.
The complete surrender you speak of is infused with a carte blanche of faith and trust in Him, never doubting the path He leads you down PLUS the confidence that He knows what He’s doing.
In other words, was Moses decades in the wilderness with sheep ‘wasted.’ Then how can yours be? It can’t.